One of the best ways you can make your daughter's emotions erupt is to stay calm. I heard a lot of parents say, "I just said... and she was frightened! I think my things have gotten worse."
There is a voice of insult and control in your daughter's heart. When you let her eat more food or try to talk to her about cleaning, it is like a mine that disappears in her mind. The voice of eating disorders responds to you, not your daughter. When you realize this, it will help you be more objective, rather than reacting emotionally to her.
She still doesn't know if this is the voice of eating disorders, or even if the concept has been explained to her, she can't accept it. So when you make a simple request and advise her to put butter on her toast, it becomes the Third World War. Eating disorders require that she not allow any fat in the diet, so the more uneasy she is, the less likely you are to push.
The reality is that it is effective to involve you in this kind of battle to some extent. She knows that you can't force her to eat, as is the eating disorder. Your goal is not to upset her, but to respond calmly.
Your challenge is not to internalize what she said. When she said, "I hate you!" or threatened to eat less or run away, your reaction may be, "I know that you are upset now, just do your best." Then continue with the family conversation or try to distract her attention by changing the theme.
Orignal From: Eating Disorder - How can I dissipate when my anorexia daughter collapses?
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