The second of the twelve alcoholic adult children said: "Our self-esteem will increase with our daily approval."
Although I can praise the merits of this milestone, in order to get high self-esteem Rhapsody and the honor I hope to have one day, I chose to discuss the obstacles to achieve this goal. Although all promises are as clear as in the forest, the child who has to return to adulthood must pass, but I barely reach the first axis between the trees.
This idealized self-esteem country has three deeper and deeper obstacles.
There is obviously no adult child.
Because they don't, they can't build it for themselves.
Moreover, even if other people's positive energy and praise can cultivate it, they can't accept them, rejecting them like images reflected from the mirror.
In short, no matter what you need most, the irony is that you can repel it to the maximum extent, make sure it is rejected, and when your positive gap with your parents is betrayed and negativity. Begin to form a vicious, harmful cycle that will make you incomplete self-matching respect with them.
When a person is forced to lay a life foundation that is pieced together by defense in order to survive, they become obstacles, otherwise they will have the hope of respect and breed mistrust, which will hinder other people's life in the future. This mistrust occurs, and these people may subconsciously represent his original parental authority.
The self, an inflated substitute for the air, full of human achievements, figure, title and property, can't get this kind of respect, but it must replace the real or true self, and still be in trouble at the beginning. Protect the holy land of the inner child.
Finally, alcohol toxins are projected onto you by ingesting actual substances or bacteria transformed like air, impeding the connection of synaptic brains, otherwise it will arouse personal feelings and become an impenetrable level. Positively, it must be used to stimulate self-esteem. . Fire.
Perhaps more beneficial is to discuss how to create self-esteem, rather than how to create self-esteem and reveal the reasons for the lack of self-esteem for adult children.
It was first created not by rigor or abuse.
If you cite your dues because of your deficiencies, deficiencies, deficiencies, and obvious non-portability, it is not created by explaining or proving this treatment.
It is not created by the responsibility and responsibility of the child, because adults cannot take responsibility for themselves.
It is not created by listing the causes that caused it to happen.
Finally, it is not through the development of strategies and strategies to reach your parents and try to get their love instead of accepting you as a gift and creation of God and should be unconditionally loved.
A person thinks that he is his parents. If they judge you severely and rarely use their positive emotions to verify you, then you will soon feel the same about yourself and make your respects very dry. Like clay, you are shaped by your parents and assume they give you the shape.
Although perfectionism is a kind of praise and mainly an intellectual goal, it is another obstacle to self-esteem. It consists of standards created by standards that cannot be achieved by itself. This is an empty concept and lacks positive emotions. Instead, it is a level supported by facts, expertise and statistics.
For example, scoring "A" on an exam may cause a head stroke, but has little effect on the heart, providing food for the self and starving yourself until the person replaces the former with the latter.
I grew up in a binary environment. My mother is verifying, praising, positive and loving. No matter what I did, it made me the "best". On the other hand, my father is an ice cube, never thawed, and praise rarely escapes in a melted way.
His comments, even in the well-known "A+" case, have never flown like emotions, like "great! Beautiful work! I am proud of you!" Instead, they originated from intelligence and facts. "One 'A +'," he would say. "Well, you can't get higher."
He may be right, but I feel that his emotions cannot rise.
Although the forest was restored, I finally realized that praise does not depend on whether I am good at getting it or whether I have enough value to support it. He did not.
I recently discovered a poster that reads: "Don't let your past hinder the way you connect with God now." Although it may be painful in the past, it is actually a forest, and adult children must pass this forest. Through his self-respect, perhaps God himself.
Maybe they are the same person.
Orignal From: Barriers to self-esteem of adult children
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