I only want one
In the late 1980s, I was stationed in Germany. On my second weekend in Germany, my squadron partner invited me to join them, which will be one of my favorite activities - to participate in wine events. During the wine feast, you put a lanyard around your neck, which contains a glass that is slightly larger than the glass.
As the vender's floats pass, you will take out your glass and pour out their wine samples. If you are not careful, you may become drunk at the end of the holiday season. Finally, I was hungry, and the people I saw at the big meal ate something that looked like a steak sandwich.
Faithful to my Nebraska heritage, I never gave up the opportunity to set up a steak sandwich. Although, the only German I was at the time was "Sprechen sie English?" I found a stall where they sold sandwiches. The line is long, but no more than 15 minutes of waiting time.
A good sign, I think the sandwich must be very good. My fingers point to what I want and a small bag of markers, I think I am not only ready to get my steak. I entered the queue. When it was my turn to order, I pointed at the sandwich and raised my index finger.
The supplier nodded, and to my surprise, he came back with two sandwiches instead of the one I was looking for. Oh, he must have made a mistake. This time I lifted my index finger again, more emphasis, so he knew I only wanted one. Instead, the clerk pointed at the two sandwiches and signaled me to pay.
I am not going to pay for the two sandwiches I want. In vain, the supplier and I walked back and forth with my index finger and took out two sandwiches. As the queue started to develop behind me, I realized that it was not worth becoming an ugly American, so I reluctantly paid for two sandwiches.
The first disappointing bite I paid was that what I learned was not beef but schwenkbraten [pork chops] was not one of my favorite meats. I shared this incident with my squadron partner, but all I got was sympathy without reasonable explanation.
It was not until a few years later that I realized what happened. The index finger in German means two, and the thumbs up always means one. Even if you don't raise your thumb, you will add extra fingers to your thumb. The incident has been resolved and I received the content I requested.
Accept our differences in mixed families
As step-parents, when we join our mixed family, we quickly discover that they have different ways to do what we are used to. Differences may be ethnic, cultural, and even religious differences.
If you are new to your mixed family, don't try to change things even if your approach may be more correct, more effective, and so on. Unless it is illegal or life-threatening, don't use it for the time being.
In the Air Force, we once said, "If there is no damage, don't fix it." The way your family does things is their way. Seeking to understand and accept new ways of doing things, rather than seeking to change things. Wait six months to a year before trying to implement the change, and be sure to get support from the partner no matter what you do.
We all have our own differences, whether it is as small as the number we use to indicate two or similar fingers, just like the church where your family is. Accepting the difference in your mixed family is an important step in getting accepted as a step-parent.
Orignal From: Accept our differences
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