If you are suffering from social anxiety, you are likely to be making at least half of the following errors. The good news is that you don't have to continue with them. The first step is to realize that the following are actually errors, not just realities. They are not in a special order here.
Ruminating
Just like a cow, chewing on the rumors again - rumors mean thinking about the same thoughts in your mind. Usually it's about how much you messed up in your last social interaction. When you find yourself in a similar situation, you are more and more nervous and keep anxious.
2. Avoid uncomfortable situations
Avoid continuing anxiety. The reason for this is that when you avoid a terrible event, or you even decide to avoid it, you will immediately feel relieved. This feeling of relaxation is an enhancement to avoidance. If you choose Psychology 101, you will remember that the enhanced behavior may be repeated. It means that you will continue to use avoidance to deal with anxiety, and the cycle will remain the same: fear, avoidance, fear, avoidance, etc.
3. Use alcohol or drugs for social interaction
Although you can treat your immediate anxiety in the short term, the use of the substance does not solve the potential problem. Not to mention that you can develop a dependency. When you know the truth, you can only feel comfortable after 2-3 drinkings. When you don't have alcohol, you will definitely be anxious twice. The anxiety of any kind of medication [including prescription drugs] is anxiety, and once the drug is removed, it will definitely return. This is why studies have shown that the use of drugs alone is not effective in treating this disease.
4. Believe that your social skills are very poor
I know, I know: you are definitely from
some from
Your social skills are terrible compared to others. Wait a moment, you may go astray. In fact, knowing other people and what they think of you means that you have the raw material of a very successful socializer. In my group serving social anxious people, I often notice the considerations, punctuality and overall pleasure of those who are considered to have no social skills.
5. Suppose other people always know what to do
"Others seem to always know when to embrace, not to shake hands," is an example of this cognitive error. In fact, many social situations are inherently embarrassing, and all of us are on the same boat as we figure out how to navigate them. The difference between a person with social anxiety and a person without social anxiety is that people with social anxiety have a direct and comprehensive responsibility for any embarrassment they perceive.
Catastrophic
When you have social anxiety, social errors come at a high price. Go down the hall and stumble in front of others. Eat something messy on your chin. I don't know what to say in the conversation. These things happen to everyone, but people with social anxiety think that when they do, others will judge them severely and even decide not to like them anymore. These ideas are very automatic and you may not even realize that you own them. But think about it: If you think that a wrong step will make you condemned and disgusted, then no wonder you are so anxious!
7. Focus on yourself in front of others
The more you pay attention to yourself, the harder it is to listen, focus and respond to the people around you. Social anxiety requires you to constantly monitor yourself so that you can evaluate your performance. Unfortunately, this kind of monitoring prevents you from being able to perform optimally. Being an effective social being is about listening and being with others. It's not about interesting things or keeping talking. Frankly, this is very tiring for everyone.
8. Don't ask for help
Social anxiety is a very treatable disease. If you think it is "just your way" then it is what you will always look like. Separately left, social anxiety often runs through the chronic process of a lifetime. Yes, as you get older, you will find tips for coping, but if your anxiety still haunts you after decades, can you really? How about a year from now? If you have frequent stomach problems, you can go to the doctor to help you identify the problem. You should not have to endure anxiety because of your physical pain. Ask for help. There are many resources there. If you can't find a special social anxiety treatment, look for an anxiety treatment. good luck.
Orignal From: Social anxiety - the eight misunderstandings of patients
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